^Scariest Places on Earth Videos

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With Halloween just around the corner, it's time to talk scary TV.
And, no, we don't mean the latest "Monsterfest" on AMC or a spine-
chilling episode of "Dexter." Those are scary in a good way.

We mean scary-bad TV -- certain aspects of the medium that are so
horrifyingly awful and/or misguided that they threaten to suck the
lifeblood out of our viewing experience.

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Prime example: Those relentless promo spots Jerry Seinfeld has been
doing for his "Bee Movie." How much more frightfully laugh-free and
annoying can they get? After watching an endless stream of this
drivel, we just want to boycott the darn film and dump rocks into
Jerry's trick-or-treat bag.

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There are many other things about the current state of TV that have us
creeped out. So many, in fact, that we compiled a list. Feel free to
grab a torch and join our rampage:

# It's truly frightening how ABC has transplanted Addison Montgomery
(Kate Walsh) from "Grey's Anatomy" to "Private Practice," a spinoff
with all the vigor of brain-eating zombies. Even more frightening is
how they've turned her from a strong and complex character into a
wimpy, whiny version of Ally McBeal.

# Speaking of "Grey's Anatomy," it's Norman Bates-scary how demons
came to possess the show's writers and caused them to blunder so badly
with the gag-inducing plotline that has George hooking up with Izzie.

# It has us really on edge that "Two and a Half Men," a mildly
amusing, but largely conventional comedy, ranks No.
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1 among prime-time sitcoms, while "30 Rock," a hilariously offbeat and
Emmy-winning laugh-fest struggles to find ratings traction.

# It's absolutely terrifying to see how awful "Prison Break" has
become. The show ran for two seasons too long, and now it has simply
lost its mind. Please, Fox, spare us further horrors and drive a stake
though its heart right now.

# It's grotesque how VH1's "Flavor of Love" franchise continues to
spawn one tacky and trashy debacle after another. Now airing: a second
installment of "I Love New York," complete with its foul-mouthed,
bulgy-breasted bimbo, her she-devil mother and a collection of
dimwitted suitors who make Frankenstein look hot.

# It's highly alarming to realize that there are people in CBS upper
management who actually couldn't sniff out the corpselike stench of
"Viva Laughlin" and allowed it to get on the air. (May it rest in
pieces.)

# It's ghastly to consider that TV's serial-killers could snuff out
FX's "Damages," depriving this addictive legal thriller of a second
season.

# It's truly shocking (and dismaying) that the gritty, nuanced and
heartfelt portrait of teen life offered by "Friday Night Lights"
struggles to find viewers, while the pampered and deluded young brats
of "Gossip Girl" generate big buzz and earn a full-season pickup. The
only place we want to watch them is in a bloody slasher film.

# It freaks us out to realize how quickly a fine show such as "Heroes"
can lose its mojo. Beset with sluggish plotlines, flavorless new
characters and wooden dialogue, it's just not the same show we came to
love. Someone needs to perform an exorcism in the writers' room.

# It's downright horrifying to know that HBO may never make those
"Deadwood" movies it promised us. May the ghost of Al Swearengen haunt
the network forever.

# It's absolutely appalling to see how they've pulled a chain-saw
massacre on a vintage classic by turning "Bionic Woman" into a dark
and dreary mess, and by miscasting a charisma-free Michelle Ryan in
the lead role. Sure, she has robot parts, but she doesn't have to be
totally robotic.

# It truly slays us to see how Saturday, with its lineup of reruns and
moldy movies, has become the night of the living dead.

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